Is “Doing Less” the most wanted from middle school children for parents?

Abe is in junior high. He has quite a routine schedule and he is quite occupied. He is spending more time on his homework, has many meetings and practices on Science Olympiad. About Science Olympiad, he is doing three projects this year, two last year on the JV team. I helped him quite a bit on his projects last year, however, this year, I did nothing on them. I am thinking he will learn more if he can finish by himself. In addition, he has teachers, coaches and his teammates to rely on.  Of course, I did some duties for parents such as volunteering at some of his meetings. I told Abe “If you need help from me, just ask”. But since he never asked, I think he is doing OK.  Last weekend, from one Invitational tournament, he got two fist place medals and failed his third experiment. His team will take part in another tournament in less than two weeks. So this week, he spent quite some time trying to fix it and he said the new one was much better that the old one.  I am glad that he learned some about how to solve a problem and some about responsibility.

About his travel soccer, it’s indoor season now, he has less practices per week than the fall season. My job is mainly driving him to practices and games. I would not give much advices and feedback for his games. I know he needs to learn his own way. But I do give some advices on his excises, such as some exercises to avoid injuries.

I believe “Doing Less” is the most important parenting principle for a middle school student. Although many parents could disagree and I too cannot stick to my principle perfectly. For example: asking Abe to go to sleep on time and waking him up in time and then driving him to the school.

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