What a poor old coach considering Coach Herring’s, for close to 30 years, unemployed/unemployable  and even found himself homeless at sometime. Sad but true,being a former high school coach of a later superstar. You may not be able to enjoy any financial rewards or even a proper recognition besides being thanked and remembered for your passion to the game and your sacrifices.

I like the following sentences, are they irony or a metaphor?

If life is a cycle of giving and receiving, of storing up goodwill in the hearts of those around you, of doing kindness for the sake of kindness but also for yourself, for your reserved fund, in case one day you need to make a withdrawal, when you’re old or sick or poor or maybe all three, then for the first 31 years of his life Pop Herring built about as much wealth as a man could. And then he lost most of his earning capacity, almost overnight, and what he had left were those investments is that they usually come with risk. Your never know which ones will pay off. You can put in and put in and put in, and you still might get nothing back.

But you should know, still keep “investing”, even your kids are now not good enough to be placed on school varsity team, as Michael Jordan did when he’s a sophomore in high school.

“Where?” It seemed Abe did not see any birds on his first try.

“Over there,”

“…Oh, I found it.”

“Just like chess, if you try and try, you may find something (you are looking for).”

By the way, Abe had a lucky day— he scored 3.5 points out of 4.

Today, I asked him what he did differently in that lucky tournament.

“I thought more,” Abe replied.

He had so many school activities this year. Every day, before dinner, he just got home and had no much free time; after dinner, he would do his homework for an hour or more. If he had some time to spare on chess studying before going to bed, I felt I was lucky to ask him.

Maybe there is always time to spare on chess if he looks for it — only if he likes it. Right now, once he finishes his homework, before putting the folder and books aside, he’ll turn on TV and play video games on it. Since according to him, playing video games is a type of relaxation he likes, studying chess is a type of work he’d rather avoid doing, it is reasonable to have some relaxation after doing home work. I cannot define what relaxations are for him.

I know letting him to like chess is more important than looking time and asking him to study chess for a while. Last year, I could ask him to study chess for about 45 minutes every day— not any more.  If he can’t study chess frequently, he’ll have more bad tournaments in future unless he enjoys playing chess and has a more mature mind to play.

After last tournament I told him: “Mistakes are not problems, unless you repeat them.” I hope he’d bother to learn from those mistakes and grow more interests at chess.

Today after school, he had a game. Since he also plays in AYSO on Sundays. He had soccer games or practices in four consecutive days. Next week, he will have soccer games in four consecutive days. I worried a little about his stamina— “could he get hurt if he is too tired and lost his concentration?”. But as long as he is having fun and wants running in the field, I know I should not worry too much. In addition, I know he needs to build stamina and to learn from mistakes to grow up, and to some degree, playing sports will help him playing better chess.

Soccer game after school

Abe went to several tournaments in the past weeks and had so so performances (or a bit worse) . I did not remind him anything like I usually did like “Fight to the end” or “Be patient” before games. I thought he had to learn his own mistakes himself. In addition, “New school year is coming”, negative comments, or not, will be pressure to him, he will surely have less time on chess because of the school, then he could performed even worse. It will be a vicious cycle. I do not want it, I do not want Abe to think chess is boring to him.

On one hand, I think I should give the whole cash prize to Abe since he earned it from chess tournaments. He earned the money and he should be able to decide how to spend it. If your kids play for chess, from time to time, on some lucky days, the kids may earn some cash prizes. The cash prizes make the kids excited. He or she might show off to the friends: something he or she truly “earned”. It is one of exciting moments in long hours’ chess playing.

On the other hand, from my experience, I think Abe might not spend it wisely if he spend all or most of the amount on his will. So I took some time to figure out how to “spend” the money. When Abe found out the envelope for the cash prize letter, he asked me “Where is the check? I want to have a look.”

I gave him the check and told him how to spend it. He said OK and run to show the check to Mommy and his little brother.

The next day, I and Abe went to a brokerage firm to open an investment account. We deposit most of his prize. I gave the rest to him. I told him, on future such occasions, I will give him one third of the cash prize he earned right away, and deposit and invest the rest. He will own the account and the money in it once he becomes an adult.

I know a little about investment as I know a little about chess, in fact I wrote some posts on them. I know it is very important to start early in the investment. I hope Abe can start early and learn a little on investment by opening his investment account. In addition, the whole thing might be one form of training on delayed gratification. It would be best usage for Abe’s cash prize earned from chess tournaments. Wouldn’t it?

I found an old article about the teenager Gata and his father and a recent article about  his gracious moment at 2010 US Championship. Maybe you want to take a look at both articles.

Go Gata!

The road leading to the chess center

Outside of the chess center

Inside of the chess center

It’s a pity if you missed it. By the way, there’s more snow falling the next day.

A chess tournament on a Sunday afternoon

On the way back home, I believe, I heard an interesting story from the NPR, a public radio station. At first, I heard “Tiger Mother”. Oh, more on Pushy Parenting, I thought. Then I heard that this guy’s IQ was estimated to be 50 to 100 points higher than Albert Einstein’s. Then, this guy entered Harvard University at age 11 while being qualified for admission when he was nine. What a child prodigy!  If you are interested to hear the story, click here.

Since Abe, based on a long term trend, is still on his improving stage, I do not want to put any additional pressure on his short term performance. It’s fine that he loses many games now in order to fix his weakness (such as the bad habit of playing too fast) and gain experience. It’s fine he keeps losing but keeps playing. I’d have a New Year’s Resolution if I can measure how much he increases his interest in chess and how much he slows down in his games, but I could not find any measurements. So I had to give up the thought of a New Year’s Resolution.

Abe, I felt, was curious to everything on the trip, the farmers’ market was definitely different there:

Abe is at a farmers' market

The land was poor, so were the people, but kids could still be happy. Not supposed to be?

I would think Abe was happy too most of the time. I took a picture when he was playing basketball with his little brother.

Abe is playing basketball with his little brother

No court, no hoop, no problem. “I love this game”. Not supposed to be?

It is winter time, it is cold outside. But we found some people are playing “chess” behind a wall on street.

Some people are playing "chess" on street in winter time (zoom in)

Let’s zoom the picture out to the street view.

Some people are playing "chess" on street in winter time (zoom out)

When Abe was bored with everything else, he played some chess games with the computer during the vacation. No one asked him, another not supposed to be.

Abe is playing chess with the computer

The next day, last Sunday, there was another chess tournament nearby in the afternoon, “Do you want to go?” I asked Abe. “It was up to you.”His mommy added.  Abe replied “No” the night before, “Yes” in the morning and then “No” again at the noon. I guessed that he was too tired and needed a break. Maybe we can stay at home and watch a movie together.

The DVD was borrowed from library last week.  It’s named “Like stars on earth — every child is special”. Since the movie was about a kid, his parents and one of his teachers, I thought, the whole family might enjoy it, probably, at Saturday night. Actually, we watched it at Sunday afternoon.

The movie lasted almost all the afternoon — it ran more than two and a half hours. In addition, there were some conversations in foreign language. I was surprised to find out Abe and I finished the whole movie, with some help of English subtitles. “It is a long movie, but very moving.” I said. Abe nodded. The story showed LOVE was the utmost force in discovering the talent of a seemingly retarded kid with “dyslexia”. I also got moved by some song like “Perseverance will bring the applause of the world” even you are misunderstood at the beginning.

After dinner, while Abe was playing Wii games, I asked him to do his homework.

“Wait, Daddy forced me to watch a movie all afternoon.” he must thought now Daddy should not force him to do another thing.

“But you don’t need to finish it if you don’t like it,” Mommy replied.

“I have to; it was such a heartbreaking movie.”

The first party was at the rooftop of a high-rise building

The third party was at the beach

We left home at morning, came back, all exhausted, at late evening, the kids were still excited at the end. It seemed they could still play more. Apparently, they had a good time.

Summer is running out. The starting of a new school year is just around the corner, so is the new chess season. Let’s plan for them, after today.

On Saturday morning, we went shopping and prepared for the next day’s BBQ. In the afternoon, we watched some World Cup on TV. Then Abe, I and some of our friends drove to Ravinia Festival watching (listening to) a show: A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor. A lot of people went there. When we arrived, we found that the main parking lot’s full. We had to try another parking lot which was more than 2 miles away. Aside from us being big fans of Garrison Keillor and we did mind the little inconvenience, the show itself was well worth it. You can listen the show from the website of A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor if you want to.  The show was best enjoyed if you lay on a lawn on a cool summer afternoon. In addition, it’s not a normal afternoon, but an afternoon on the July 4th weekend; no wonder so many people, including many families, came to the show.

On Sunday, we and some friends went to see the parade, then had BBQ in our backyard (the adults’ favorite was lamb kebabs, the kids’ favorite was roasting marshmallows), then walked to watch the fireworks in a nearby, if riding in a car, park when it was dark.

We didn’t know how many miles we walked in those two days. Although very tired, all seemed having a good time and could, fortunately, have a good long sleep.

As usual, Abe was in charge of the remote control. I was glad that he mostly chose the Soccer World Cup, which I was more than happy to watch together. In addition, Abe and I watched a very moving documentary film from ESPN: The Two Escobars. The film was about soccer and crime, honesty and lying, a people’s struggle and a nation’s struggle. After watching it, I said to Abe “A player needs to play with heart at every chance, never gives up.” Abe nodded. Except we all agreed it was a very good film, I did not know what else proper to say at the moment. I would highly recommend it whether you like soccer or not. You may want to check this review if you want watch it on TV or preorder the DVD.

We drove back on Wednesday afternoon, made home at about 4:30 pm. Abe’s basketball game (the first one of the summer league) began half an hour later. Upon his insistence, Abe and I had to leave at once for the game. We were glad Abe’s team won the game from behind. Abe looked a little tired, but made some defense plays.

Wow, what a team effort. Great game, everyone!

round five of top three boards

The evening was a wet spring evening: it drizzled on leaves that were turning green.  Abe went to play with his friends in their house. Abe’s little bother, his mommy and I went to another party.

When we returned home, Abe was waiting in front of house—he just arrived minutes earlier. We said goodbye to his friends and their parents. Going from the driveway to the front door, we found that one of two main branches of our ginkgo tree was lying on the ground. There could be a big wind when we were away that brought the branch down.

The next morning, we went out to examine the tree again. The branch just missed the roof, and it was so big the part of it laid in the neighbor’s yard. Some of our neighbors came over and talked about what happened yesterday and other similar happening in the neighborhood before. The big downed branch could cause a lot of damage, fortunately, no one was hurt and our house was not hit either.

The brothers were playing and jumping around the branch. Here are some pictures, the brothers were very happy, weren’t they?

The brothers

Abe jumps

David jumps

One day,  Mommy told me what happened on the way she and Abe were entering our apartment: When she was collecting the mail from the mailbox, watching at the mail box, Abe suddently had a question for Mommy,

“Mommy, why it is marked with your last name and my last name? where is Daddy’s?” Maybe he felt lucky for himself or he somewhat felt sorry for his Daddy.

The answer was easy for her, and even easy for him if he think twice . “Oops, life is made of what you think,” I was surprised that he asked that question. But on another thought,  in whatever conditions, how unlucky or lucky you feel, the facts may be totally different from what you feel. Always think positive. OK?

Maybe not entirely true. As I mentioned in another post, Abe’s basketball games are on Saturdays. Most chess tournaments are held on Saturdays too. He likes playing both basketball and chess. If he goes to the basketball game, he can’t go to the chess tournament of the same day, and vice versa. The basketball season ends in late March, until then, he has to play basketball less often than he likes and to spare some time to play chess tournaments. If Abe can choose whatever he likes, he may choose both, but it is not possible.

If the weather allows, you may choose more outdoor activities: going to a zoo with kids,  picnic gathering in a park,  fishing on a lake… I loved fishing several years ago when I had more free time. Many people have  stories about fishing or hunting. I do not want to tell my stories of the good old days, instead, I would like share an old picture showing the harvest after a fishing trip:

the good old days - after a fishing trip

…My bad, I caught those fish on a Sunday, not on a Saturday.

Any way, cheer up for the weekend, no matter you will be free or busy.

or reading this wonderful interview by Jennifer Shahade.

I recently read the book “Searching for Bobby Fisher” by Fred Waitzkin. (Not the movie as I talked in other posts). Although this book is about the author’s son, another chess prodigy named Josh Waitzkin, there are some descriptions of Jeff, Jeff’s older sister, and his father.  Some excerpts from this book are listed:

About Jeff:

He was different from any other kid I had ever met. His passion for the game was hotter…Jeff believed that no other child was in his class.

About Josh’s coach, Bruce Pandolfini’s comments on Jeff:

For months, Pandolfini had said that if they met, Jeff would be Joshua’s toughest competition. They had similar attacking styles, and both played the endgame with a sophistication rare even among chess prodigies. Bruce had said that if Josh played Jeff it would be like playing against himself.

About Jeff and his father, Mike Sarwer:

Jeff’s father demanded perfection from his kids. In an interview he once described how he had taught Jeff not to have nightmares. In stead of comforting the child, Mike Sarwer would let him to go back to sleep and bring his dream back, but this time he had to overcome the conflict that had terrified him. Mike claimed that both his children had learned to do this…But whether because of his father’s training or because of a natural fighting spirit, spindle-legged, bald-headed little Jeff perceived himself to be a chess superman…Five hundred and fifty kids had come to Charlotte for this tournament and slept in nice beds, but according to several parents, Jeff and his sister and farther slept in their car.

About Jeff and Josh:

Despite their tense relationship, Josh respected Jeff and deferred his great passion…

How to give a kid a happy life when he/she is young? no matter you have  a child chess prodigy or not. It is my intention this site will promote that each kid has a strong mind, strong body and strong bond with parents. Do you want to leave your thoughts here?

Being an adult, Jeff looks quite happy now. I wish Jeff all the best whatever he choose to do.